fml

Hello blog… I basically not in the right mood today.. Coz I realised that people are sooo not considerate bout others. One thing for sure is that they just care about themselves and obviously they are self-centred. I don’t know but for me, I’d always think about others. How they feel, what they want, where they got hurts and stuffs… I feel like I’ve been trapped in the world of selfishness and harshness. And I also feel like I’ve been controlled by people. Controlling over my life’s and stuffs. I mean come on… Can’t I have anytime for myself? Can’t I make my own decision and do whatever I want? Can’t I live my own life? I’m sorry God coz I really feel like spilling out what is in my heart right at the moment. I’m sorry for complaining too much but I really feel like at certain point my life is unfair…

Its the 20th of December and its 5 days away till Christmas!!!! YIPPY!!!!!! Aren't you guys excited and happy for the coming of Christ???? We should be happy and celebrate for the coming of Christ!!! I'm almost done with my christmas shopping and just left one more and I'm done with everyone's pressie!!! Hopefully everyone loves their gifts....=) Cheers people <3......

In our life.........

It is awesome meeting new friends or get to know new people in your life but hey, don't get me wrong coz I am not the most social person on earth seeing that I don't really click with everybody or anybody . I know I'm such a loner. But seriously I really am. I've been trying so hard to mix around these few years but mostly fails (in terms of friendship). It will be worth working on and keeping it, however it takes time to find those connection. The most important thing is trust in between. It is hard to trust someone and it is hard for me to put trust on anyone now . Of course except my families and bf. For god sake why would you lie to the one who trusted you so much? Tell me what will you get or what is the benefit of telling lie? Therefore, it is very hard to squeeze a relationship (friendship) in because it has already becomes a phobia in you. So many of us have at least one bad story in life.. So perhaps, maybe we will feel better if we share our stories with families at least we can be aware of it next time. Oh yes, and bear in mind that your own secrets might be reveal too if the one you've told is a scumbag.

My spririt lifted high!!!!

So yeah!!! I've Passed all my units this semester!!!!!YAY!!!!!!! Gosh, was feeling nervous last night before they released the result...and surprisingly I passed managing change which is my worst nightmare throughout the semester and the only unit I'm worried the most!!! Because its super tough as what all the seniors said and there are lotsa theories that we need to understand and memorise... Praise the Lord !!! I've passed it!!! Now I can enjoy my holidays peacefully and i can proceed for tougher units next year... geezz..... Cheers people!!!

Last paper today!! And I'm free like a bird now... So many plans and it makes me suffocated just now... LOLss....But I'm feeling slightly better now.. Had my lunch at McD with Ray and others at parkson and got bumped into sis and bro in law hehehe.... Well, Im gonna get my pressie tonight!! yay!!! Mum and dad will be back by tonight too and i guess we will be having dinner outside again...=) I dont know what happened to me coz I just cant stop eating and my weight is increasing...Is this a disease or what????gosh... I should go for cardio or stuffs or anything as long as it can burn all my fatssss away.. =S...

Was planning to watch Harry Potter today but hopefully I can watch it tonight or other times... hehe... *yawns* Im pretty tired and exhausted and I think Imma off for a nap now...Byesss....

Huha.....

So the bf is back (at last).... and this means vacation, shopping and food hunting time!! Weee..... Well, my depressed mood drop drastically after he came back last Sunday.... So buh bye moody bugs... And to those hypocrites, you might think that I'm the bad, mean or anything I dont care anymore... But bear in mind and always remember, those caring and love for you which had been given by us will be wash down to the drain... You asked for it!! No one force you.. and yeah I'm kinda pissed off after i heard the news... I thought that you will take a good care of it but its ok coz at least it would not suffer in your hand anymore...

Anyways, Im very happy coz we went to excapade yesterday with the bf and his friends.. and thanks to Shaun for the ride...=) Those raw foods really awesome!!! Thumbs up!! Oh yeah... Still left 1 more paper to go and I'm freeeeeeee like HELL!!!! HAHAHA!!! Christmas is around the corner and I'm freaking excited!!! Coz dear gonna cook some dishes for christmas... After that we can countdown for our trip to KL and Sg... weee.... Its been so long we didn't go for vacation together.. I guess its time to pamper ourselves with some shoppings and foodie!! Geezzz... how am I gonna lose weight if my mind keep on thinking about foods? I cant believe I'm hell heavy now..shhhh...not gonna tell u my weight though.... CHEERS!!!

Why?

I don't know since when I'm an optimist person??? I mean, you see many people open their hearts and confides me by telling me their problems, snags and stuffs and I'm the one trying to comfort them and cheer them up. Instead, I can't even think like how I said to other people whenever I'm dying from inside by saying " Oh , don't worry about me.. I'm Ok".. But the truth is, I'm not ok. Why am I hiding all this all the way? Carry all the burden without asking for any help...? But come to think of it, it is better that not to tell coz I rather carry it myself instead of troubling people to carry the same burden with me. It will be double the misery....T.T

U're driving me NUTS!!!! Get it.....!! NUTS!!!! Why you do this to me? Did I do anything that offended you? Did I? I've tried my best to make you happy but yet you make me sick, disappointed and sad all the time. Sometimes I really dont know what you want from me...

=D

I'm sooooOOOooooOOOoooo happy today !!! YAY!!! I received my parcel today!!! OMG!!!! Thanks to the seller coz her service is awesome!!! Gotta buy more from her soon but not now coz I've just place my order on another seller hehehehehehe......=)

Dum dee dum dum dee dum dum dee dum dum!

Finally , I've already done those 2 freaking presentations last week.. So no more... YAY!!!! But one more group assignment to go *yawns*... I wish there's someone who can replace me coz im super duper lazy at the moment...I've just finished the LAST topical issue which i think I've done it quite bad coz basically I think it's kinda hard to find those articles.. Oh well, fingers cross and hopefully I can get higher marks ... Finals is around the corner and as usual, I havent started anything yet but i will ok? LOlssss *as if* It's a miracle if you guys see me do revision this early... but who knows... Right?? LOLssss...But I love the exam timetable coz both units has a big gap in between... so yeah.. I got plenty of times yo!

Recently, I'm sooooo damn addicted with make ups ( thanks to Sophie n Flora).... Coz I finally realised that make up is VERY VERY crucial for ladies... I guess LOL.... well this is what i think.. who knows... haha...maybe wrong I dont know.... And I really invested a lot on it and I think its a bad sign coz there will be a BIG, HUGE, MASSIVE hole in my purse.... *cries*..... I should have save some money for my Sg trip next year... But then again ... Those palettes really makes me happy...Today, I told Sophie that I even dreamt about those palettes but I think in her mind she was like " What the Heck ?".. LOls... so yeah...

I've got a long list of stuff waiting for me.... gosh..And yes... I wanna get a watch so badly... I need a watch... My previous watch from Guess can't function anymore... sobs... It's my fav watch man... The guy said I dropped it therefore it cant work anymore.... But then I think I should just keep it to become an antique for my great grand son or daughters... LOLsss...

Hehe... My latest pic.... In the Library yo!!!

I love you....

If tomorrow never comes......My words never comes in your mind.....

Change Direction

.... Basically this is how and what B felt whenever B see the way A talk, stare and also body contact with C.... And its totally different from how A treated B....... Sometimes B wonder, whether A is making the right choice? Maybe, B is just the replacement or just a bridge for A to cross over... Well, if it is... Pls dont let B suffer anymore.... Coz it hurts a lot.... I basically know how it feels... The conversation between A and C is more lovely than the conversation between A and B.... Well.... Lets face it... B will never get the priority.....And maybe there's no room for B to fit in into A's heart..... WHat am I talking bout here??? Crazy Ivy...

Losing faith......sigh......

Last day

Hello readers!! It's the last day of study break... Now back to reality... Gosh... Its October and finals is around the corner...Time, please slow down the pace coz it's too fast and i can't breath any longer. Uni assesments has been killing me ever since the sem started few months ago without realising I've been pretty much skipping tutorials this sem... Bad Ivy... Oh well, when laziness comes everything change LOL.... But, I won't skip class again coz skipping class is definitely a NO NO habit so, nah uh it's not good at all... Children, please don't follow my footsteps...

Oh yeah, I just got back from a dinner at Imperial Palace Hotel. The food was ok but I do love the environment maybe because it's new hehe... Next time, Im gonna try the western food there coz I heard its way cheaper compare to Siamese. ( Hopefully)... LOLs... Anyways, Jadence and Andrea are getting bigger day by day and I'm happy to see them grow up so fast especially Andrea... She's the cutest of all..But of course it doesn't mean that Jadence not cute ok... Both of them are my angel... hehehehe.... I guess I'll stop here.... Tata....

DOOM!!!

Well, it's Saturday already gosh!!!! And next week the class starts again!! Time passes so fast that u don't even realised how fast the time runs.... So is it a good thing or a bad thing for me? Well, I think it's good coz I can't wait for my sis wedding this November and I'm gonna be her maid of honour which i think it's kinda tiring... HAHA!!! Sorry sis... But anyway, congratulation on your marriage with Ken=) I'm happy for you guys..... and soon it will be my turn. HAHAHAHAHA... ( slaps self)... Come on wake up Ivy.. Stop day dreaming!!! Ok , change topic... So Im gonna work extra hard this sem coz I dont want the same old thing happen again. God please bless me this time..=) I really need your help and blessings to go through all the obstacles which I'm gonna face this coming week. I know it's gonna be hard and tough but I promise I'm gonna work extremely hard for that... I know I can.. Gosh, I need some motivation and encouragement seriously!!! I think I better stop here coz I can see managing change assignment is waving at me now... I gotta complete it as soon as I can and it's making me nervous for still dragging my work till last minute.... (Double slaps self)....

Things are getting better these few days...and I hope it continue till the end or forever as our relationships are getting closer and nearer day by day. I'm not hoping much coz at this moment it is the most perfect picture (quoted by Sophie). I dont want anyone ruin it.. Especially those troublemakers and those who still in denial stage for being a troublemaker. I'm not saying that you're trying to do anything to us but then i know deep inside your heart you wanna get something . But, u have to think. Coz by the end of the day, the consequences may impact on you too...I'm not cursing or anything coz what goes around comes around and it really happen. God Bless...

Study Break

Eventually, i failed to do my assignments or work for the first few days which i had already planned (I hate myself). But anyways, i enjoyed myself last night coz we had a small BBQ at Sophie's place and overnight at her place. It was fun as I learned a lot from her and overall I really had great time with her as well as Dien and Hung and yes I know I walked away during game time coz I really wanna watch that movie hehehe.... Sorry guys.... hehe.... Im feeling a lil better today.. Coz everything going on smoothly. I think im gonna die if this thing still continue as I'm really really sick and tired of all this shit. But I want to let you know that I can forgive you but please... if you were in my place you would feel the same way too.. So please be considerate. I dont wanna hurt anyone. It's more than enough and I'm done with it. So i hope next time, think twice before you wanna do or say anything ....

Another day

Thank you Lord for giving me another day though im still depress.. somehow i try to forget.. But, i believe that everythings gonna be fine... I think this is not a good year for me and i need to bear for few months again.. but i know i can hold on to it... and i believe i can make it through... Since January i've been facing sadness and depression conquers my daily life.. Let me list down...

January - My beloved grandma gone.

February - Someone leave.

March - Aunty from Kuching gone.

April - My Favourite Aunty from Kuching gone.

May - Exam

June -Result ( Sadness)

July - At least this month better

August - None

September - Worst month ever......

Well, life goes on... This is life people coz ppl come and ppl go in your life...I know it is sad.. but we gotta move on.. and i wish that the person know what i want... I hope you know how i feel...

Message to God

Dear God, Pls grant my wish... But before that .... Let me fulfill all the things that should be done... Please guide me wherever i go and when the time comes... I will be free and happy and be the choirs of angel....

Not in the right mood now.... so I guess u all better back off before I do anything to you guys.....

Sigh.... I cant wait for November to come.... Coz someone will be coming back that time and this means...IT'S VACATION and SHOPPING time and this time i wanna spend my holiday wisely and of course buy all the stuff that I want and the list is super long ..And its gonna be fun coz maybe we'll be going to a few places but Singapore is a MUST !!! LOLsssss...And i think imma gonna shop like mad =))))) Sound scary but once in a while so i think it should be ok..teehee.... and i can't wait till JULY!! Yay!!! Will be going to KL with mummy n sis .. and its SHOPPING time again!!!! weeee...... I've listed down what I want to buy and I think maybe..just maybe I'll get the bag that I want!!! Oh... I just cant wait... But if Euro rate still drop like mad, I think I'm gonna ask Doreen to get it in Paris=))))))))...HAHAHAHA..... Oh god I just love shopping... Just can't help it though...I wanna get some cases for my gadgets so it wont get scratches and stuff especially my baby ipod...sigh.... Anyhow, I shall continue on with my revision.... tata peeps...

Sad to see your reaction just now. I'm sorry for what I've done that hurts you.. I'm sorry that I never care for you.. I'm sorry for shouting at both of you the other day yet you still pamper me just like you always do and I never even bother about it. I'm sorry coz i didnt met your expectation last sem. I'm sorry for not being a good girl all this while. I'm sorry.. But I promise I'll try my very best to get through everything...
I love you...

BAck

What's wrong with me? I've been neglecting you for so long...sigh.... Anyway, life's still the same. Eat, sleep, study, assignment, uni, work, chores.... blah.... Well it's almost end of the 1st semester and final is around the corner and i freakingly have not yet started any single shit...and it's 3 weeks away from now... Okays... Anyway, If only I didnt know bout it , then things won't be ended up like this.. So down now... I dont know why ... I just wanna scream as loud as i can now but I can't coz Andrea is around... I dont wanna scare her off. And u know what I had this some sort of sad dream... and i wish it wont happen in real life. I'm scare.. everything's gonna be different without u...Ok, enough said..2010 is not a good year for me... FTW.....